It’s a difficult world out there. You were my little girl and now you are ready to take on the world. You will have your own new experiences. You will make mistakes. You will stumble, fall and learn to get up. You will make new friends; some of whom I may not even approve of. You will fall in love and might have a heart break or two. You will learn and discover many things on your own, but there are a few things that I always want you to remember –
You are beautiful
There is no such thing as a perfect body. The society, the billboards, the tv commercials and the movies may suggest that there is, but in reality, people come in every shape and size. It is okay that you want to look your best. But always remember that a good heart is what makes you more beautiful and a smile is the best makeup you can wear.
Understand your hormones
Getting a period is an important part of womanhood, it means you can be a mother if and when you decide to be one. You may see your friends being unperturbed during that time of the month, while you may wriggle in pain, or may be irritable.It is fine to feel how you are and its okay to talk about it. Each woman has a different menstrual experience. Try to understand your cycle and how your body responds to it. Don’t let your hormones takes over your life, just be prepared for it.
Stand up for yourself
You will meet people who will try to judge or change the way you think, the way you talk, the way you carry yourself, the way you act. It is okay to listen to them, if you wish to. But do not be afraid to voice your opinions and your beliefs, even if you think you might offend someone. Be respectful to them, but do not think twice about standing up for yourself. You do not have to accept the things that you are not okay with. If you are not happy with the way someone is treating you, the way someone is talking to you, the way someone is touching or looking at you, let it be known – loud and clear.
Do what you do – because you want to, not because the society expects you to
More often than not we let the society mould our thoughts and actions – what clothes to wear when, what profession to choose, when to marry and when to have babies. We do not need to live by these rules. Do what you love. Follow your heart and that ways you will never be disappointed. And yes, you can choose to be single all your life. You can decide to focus on your career, or be a doting mother to your babies or do both. The choice is yours. But of course, be sensitive to people whom you are sharing your journey with.
Be Financially Independent
Money can’t buy you happiness, but it still is important. The confidence you gain from being financially independent cannot be gained in any other way. You can never predict the hardships or unforeseen incidents that may happen in the future. But the confidence that you can handle things on your own, if need be, can be very reassuring. You don’t need a man, or for that matter anyone to take care of you. You can take care of yourself.
Everyone is equal
You are equal to the men around you. Don’t let the society make you believe otherwise. You deserve the same opportunities, the same chances, the same freedom, the same choices that men get. And if there is anything they can achieve, you can too. It is your capability that determines the heights you reach and not your gender. Treat men also with the same respect that you expect them to treat you.
I want you to remember all this, but most of all want you to remember that I will always have your back and will always be around when you need me. You were my little girl, and you always will be.
Infano is a platform that aims to impact every facet of a woman's life - health, career, motherhood, lifestyle, and much more. We are a team of like-minded individuals who wish to be a support to women from all walks of life and in everything they do. Our aim, through our posts and articles, is to bring to light the issues and problems that women face in their day-to-day life, to try and make their life a little easier and a little better, provide the latest news updates of women around the world, and to highlight their big and small achievements. We celebrate womanhood each and every day.
Daughters’ Day: These Daughters Share Times When They Got Into Their Parents’ Shoes!
The pros of working with digital platforms and writing online are that you end up remembering all the important dates, days and festivals. In case you forget a single one, twitter ensures that you find it in your trending list!
Today is daughters’ day — and I woke up with a WhatsApp text from my mum! No, I was in the house with her, but in the age of digital communication, she wanted this text to remain on my phone always. Parents, I sometimes wonder, are so naive and pure!
So this daughter’s day, I decided to publish this feature when the day ends — to make you realize that emotions and relationships don’t belong to one particular day and the stories are meant to live forever.
These daughters share one of the most beautiful parts of their lives with us — when they got into their parents’ shoes and excelled in the time of crisis — which made their parents realize that their daughter is all grown up now!
She’s always been a mess — a beautiful and notorious one! “From being a bratty child all through junior college to barely finishing my degree, my parents always worried about how I’d sail through. But cut to now, each day as they see me handle my clients and grow every day, they smile at me and tell me every day that having a daughter was the biggest blessing in their life,” Srishti’s excitement was so evident while she shared this with me.
She asked her mother about an emotional moment which she could share with us, and the answer was — “when Srishti purchased an AC from her first salary!” And she was super emotional.
Remember the times when we packed our bags and left home to explore our own ways? The excitement & feeling of living independently and the pain & emotions of leaving parents back is something we all have been through.
Sramana being the chhota bacha of the family has always been pampered the most. When she left for Pune, her parents were worried, especially her baba, but she managed everything pretty well. “I travelled alone and waited for seven hours at the airport. I learnt cooking, did every household chore, and took care of my elder sister too. Everyone used to say that ‘beti badi ho gayi’ but yes, all of these made me realize that managing a home is not easy. Hats off to you maa,” Sramana scolds her maa and baba whenever they neglect themselves. Parents often ignore their own health and well being when it comes to their kids, and that’s when Sramana becomes their mother — to remind them that nothing is more important than their well being!
“Jagriti was in 3rd year when she lost her mom. She has always been a bold and super confident girl, but her mother’s demise took away all her charm and happiness. She didn’t talk to anyone and barely stepped out of her room. And after a month of struggle with herself, she came into the dining area one day — called the maid, got the entire house cleaned, and prepared the breakfast and meals for her younger sister and me.
That night, while giving me my medicines, she said, ‘dad we cannot afford this anymore. Mom would hate us for making this house and our lives such a mess. She hasn’t left us yet, but I bet if the maid doesn’t come tomorrow, she will pakka run away!’ And the next moment, I was laughing my heart out with eyes full of tears.
It’s been three years since my wife left us, but my daughter managed the house and our lives so well. How could we be blessed with such a beautiful angel? She is my daughter, my friend, my guide and my mother sometimes. And I wish her in my every birth,” Jagriti’s father writes to me while her daughter books another online workshop for him.
When Balaji brought Pihu home for the first time, he knew that she was the one! “A sweet little naughty girl — Pihu never fails at making us ROFL through her mischievous side. She never sits silent and loves playing with me. Oh, and she loves papaya like anything! I bet even if you give her one whole papaya, she can eat it entirely at one go,” Balaji doesn’t see Pihu as a dog.
Yes, animals are family — a beautiful part of our lives. Balaji didn’t give birth to Pihu, but he would love to be her mommy forever. She is a seven months old bundle of joy and happiness without whom he cannot imagine his days now.
“Back in 2014, my mother suffered from cardiac arrest. I was in my first year of graduation, and she was hospitalized for around two months. Since then I have stepped up in her shoes and managed the whole household on my own,” Sakshi shares that moment when her life got upside down.
It was hard for the young Sakshi, but she did manage everything so beautifully and is still continuing that. And considering the amount of responsibilities she has been fulfilling for her family, her mother says that she has become of all her home.
Rashmi’s life changed when she saw her mother in bed for more than a week. For someone like her mother, who was always active and full of energy, Rashmi couldn’t bear seeing her like this. “Vertigo made her weak — a disease which a lot of people are not aware of was making our lives difficult. My mom was very weak and always felt dizzy,” Rashmi was home for vacation at that time.
Though the maid was there to help her with all the washing and cleaning chores, she still had a lot to manage. “I used to cook with whatever knowledge I had and that was the first time when I took full responsibility for the kitchen. I used to give my mom food, tablets, and hot water whenever she needed and she recovered within a month, “ Rashmi smiles while recalling that.
But what she heard later from her mother made her proud and emotional, “my mom was telling my nani that I took care of her exactly how she used to take care of me when I was sick!”
Remember the times when we fight with our parents only to make them realize that everything on WhatsApp is not true and that superstitions are not meant to believe?
“I remember this was around my wedding preparations. We used to get time for shopping only on weekends, and my mom never allowed me to buy utensils or stuff on Saturdays. Every time she used to come up with such gyans, I had to give her the logic for that. I still do! My father almost signed on a property paper in a long-lost family dispute and that just didn’t make sense, but I stepped in between and made him realize that he was being cheated. Parents are definitely more experienced than us, but a part of theirs is so innocent and unaware of the frauds that we children have to act as their guardians at times,” Rakshita smiles while recalling her old memories.
They say elder sisters are no less than a mother and I completely second that! When Supriya was in standard 12th, her parents got admitted to a hospital for almost a week because of dengue. “My brother was in standard 11th — so yes, not much younger than me. But I used to wake up early every day to make him breakfast. Then I used to wake him up, and we used to go to school. I was making lunch and dinner after coming back from school,” Supriya recalls.
Her parents were admitted in Ahmedabad, and they were in Gandhinagar, so it was difficult for them to visit their parents every day. “I used to prepare fruit juices and send other necessary stuff with my neighbours who used to visit them,” this was the time when she took the entire responsibility on her so efficiently!
A lot of people still believe that daughters are a burden, but these daughters are proving that it’s a blessing to give birth to a daughter and day is just not enough for all the love and happiness they bring with them! #ChotiChotiKhushiyaan #HappyDaughtersDay
A 'non-9-5 desk job' ambivert geek who chooses her own audience, Sonali loves sharing stories and finding the corners where humanity still exists! She believes that every individual's story is unique and special. She loves writing about the untouched and unspoken segments of society. When not writing, you can find her listening to someone's stories or playing with dogs. Sonali values mental health and encourages people to speak their heart out!