Domestic Violence In Lesbian Relationships

Highlights

Identified as a growing social problem, violence in intimate lesbian partners includes sexual, physical, or psychological abuse.

Sadly, domestic violence in lesbian relationships is less likely to be reported to the police as many states and countries still do not recognize same-sex relationships and marriages.

Creating awareness ensures that those at the receiving end of the violence will have better access to services and, ultimately, get the help they need.

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Does the term “domestic violence” conjure up an image of a husband (physically or otherwise) abusing his wife? If you answered yes, like most of us, then we all have some re-thinking to do. The thing is, domestic violence in our country, and largely in the world as well, is always assumed to be violence taking place in a heterosexual relationship. However, recent studies show that rates of domestic violence among same-sex partners can be equal if not at a higher level than heterosexual ones.

Often, calls for help from abused partners in same-sex relationships tend to be ignored by authorities. The matter isn’t considered “serious”. But why is this so? And what can be done to change this? In this article, I’ll be digging deep into domestic violence, particularly in lesbian relationships, hoping to throw some light and create awareness about this issue.

What is Lesbian Partner Violence & What Are Its Causes?

Identified as a growing social problem, violence in intimate lesbian partners includes sexual, physical, or psychological abuse. Although, according to researchers, physical violence is more prevalent.

Firstly, it’s essential to know where the violence stems from and what are the possible causes. Some experts believe that same-sex relationships are the subject of added stressors. These stressors can be internal and external. External stressors are a result of society’s ill-treatment and discrimination towards the LGBT community.

On the other hand, internal stressors are the ones more harmful and damaging. It is when the abuser projects negative feelings and attitudes about themselves onto their partner. And in most cases, the person subjected to abuse begins to believe that they deserve the violence due to all the internalized negative beliefs they have about themselves!

Is Lesbian Domestic Violence Reported To The Police?

Sadly, domestic violence in lesbian relationships is less likely to be reported to the police. A common reason for this is that many states and countries still do not recognize same-sex relationships and marriages. The law fails to protect lesbian partners. Thus, the person abused is reluctant to report the violence in fear of coming out as homosexual and receiving prejudicial treatment.

And even if someone does report it, the complaint may not be taken seriously by authorities and legal bodies. And, the reason for that? The common misconceptions we have in society about violence in general. We often think of violence as that propagated by a man or someone with more physical strength onto the woman. Unfortunately, this prejudice does more harm than that.

When violence in a lesbian relationship gets reported, it’s somehow always assumed that the partner who has more physical strength or who is more butch is the one who’s at fault. But this is absolutely untrue. Abuse has more to do with power and control and less to do with muscularity and physical might. It’s time we learn/unlearn to equate violence perpetration with men and masculinity.

What Can We Do To Help?

Activists say that raising awareness of the problem of abuse in same-sex relationships can be particularly helpful. Creating awareness ensures that those at the receiving end of the violence will have better access to services and, ultimately, get the help they need. Some liberal and progressive states in the US such as Massachusetts have introduced various fundings and provisions to ensure gay victims of domestic violence receive the same access and help that a heterosexual person would receive.

To imagine the same happening in India is, of course, not an overnight dream. Especially in a country where merely acknowledging and accepting same-sex relationships is frowned upon, providing help to victims in such relationships can be far-fetched.

But I firmly believe that when people come together, change happens. If you’re looking to help, start by looking out for the people around you. Someone you know is going through something similar, and they confide in you? Let them know that they can call and rely on you for help in any way.

The silence that has existed around lesbian relationships, and now around their domestic violence issues, is the biggest threat here. The various myths, fears, taboos, and discrimination have prevented this from becoming the subject of a public discussion. It’s high time you and I speak up and break this silence, shall we?

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Women never fail to amaze! From managing an entire house to a school, company, district, state or nation — they keep proving us that they are equally capable as other genders and can do wonders if given a chance!

Creating a new history, two Indian Navy officers — Sub Lieutenant Kumudini Tyagi and Sub Lieutenant Riti Singh — are going to be the first women combatants who will be operating as specialists (observers) onboard Indian Navy helicopters which operate from the deck of warships.

Women officers, before this, have been overseeing the logistics and medical department of Navy fleet tankers but they were never a part of the crew onboard destroyers or frigates. But with these two young officers, things will be changing for the better. The sub lieutenants would be trained for operating a host of sensors onboard navy multi-role helicopters, and they would further be responsible for detecting enemy submarines and warships and provide targeting solutions to the pilots of the choppers. The latter would fire the actual weapons, torpedoes or anti-ship missiles.

“They would, in effect, be the first set of women airborne combatants who would be operating from warships. Earlier, entry of women was restricted to the fixed-wing aircraft that took off and landed ashore,” Indian Navy spokesperson Commander Vivek Madhwal said.

Rear Admiral Antony George also called it ‘a landmark occasion wherein for the first-time women will be trained in helicopter operations which would ultimately pave the way for the deployment of women in frontline warships of Indian Navy.’

“Things are changing in the Indian Navy every day. The Navy is giving everybody an opportunity every day. Yes, we’re breaking barriers every day, but there are a lot of opportunities coming up every day. Whatever role the Indian Navy gives us, we will gladly take them,” Sub Lieutenant Riti Singh, a fourth-generation armed forces officer, told NDTV. Her father had retired from the Navy several years ago.

“Our training has been really rigorous. We’ve both completed over 60 hours of training… We take pressure and tension bang on. We don’t get worked up,” she said.

“We’ve been treated equally… Whatever training our male counterparts received, we went through the same training… It is a huge responsibility; the task is a challenge. We are looking forward to it,” Sub Lieutenant Kumudini Tyagi, who is from Ghaziabad near Delhi, told NDTV.

As per the reports, the women officers from the Indian Air Force may also join their naval counterparts in shattering the glass ceiling with a woman fighter pilot being trained to fly the newly induct Rafale fighter jets. The pilot would be based out of the 17 Squadron in Ambala where the five Rafale jets are stationed.

Infano salutes these gritty lady officers and the entire Indian Navy on the occasion of Indian Navy day.

Indian Navy day is celebrated on 4 December every year to recognize the achievements and role of the Indian Navy to the country. 4 December was chosen as on that day in 1971, during Operation Trident, the Indian Navy sank four Pakistani vessels including PNS Khaibar, killing hundreds of Pakistani Navy personnel. On this day, those who martyred in the Indo-Pakistan War of 1971 are also remembered.

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