We are in the 21st century year 2021, the year that is full of hope, warmth, and expectations. However, even though the calendar year changed, a few things remained to be unchanged.
We as a woman did not stop apologizing for things we need not. For example, wearing what we want, reacting to a sexist joke, or standing up for a fellow woman.
Here is the compiled list of the things women should not apologize anymore for.
Choosing their own career path: Whether you decide to become a bartender, a DJ, a lawyer, or a gym instructor – follow your passion unapologetically. We already apologize for our entire existence, at least dreams should be followed with an unapologetic heart.
Not starting a new family: Women are constantly bogged down under pressure. First, they are pressurised to get married and then to start a new family! Give it a break. Whether you wish for motherhood or not should be completely your choice. So, stop apologizing for choosing to be childless.
Not being lady-like: What is exactly lady-like? Well, who cares! If society is shaming you for being less lady-like – show it the middle finger and move on. Whether they comment about your walking style, sitting manner, choice of your clothes, or mannerism in general – do heck with them.
Standing up for another female: Nothing is better than seeing a female standing up for another. When you know that the other woman in the picture is correct, stand up for her irrespective of what anyone says. You need not apologize for supporting the truth.
Questioning everything: From the vulture that asks us to shut up to the society that doesn’t appreciate rebellious women – remember, you can question everything and everyone. It may irk a lot of people around you, sometimes even your family member but, you need not apologize for that at all.
Earning more than your man: We are in the 21st century where gender roles are challenged every day by one person or the other! It is okay if you earn more than your spouse, it is not a big deal and certainly not worth apologizing.
For living life: We are in a time when you can literally be shamed for anything – even if it means living independently. But, don’t pay any heed to such comments. An independent woman can rule the world and besides it contributes in the overall development of her personality.
Society has always been afraid of strong and fierce women. Women who question the belief system and reverse gender roles are often looked down upon on purpose. But, that doesn’t make them wrong.
Fix your crown girl, you need not apologize for existence!
The adjective empath is derived from the word empathy. Empathy is the ability to understand the emotions and perspectives of others even if one is not necessarily going through the same.
Female empaths can be the most emotionally intelligent, intuitive, committed, caring and fiercely independent women you have in your life.
It is wonderful to have a female empath as a partner or friend as they can sense your needs and emotions even if you are struggling to confront them.
Some people get distraught too when their friend is nursing a grief. Sometimes they may feel that other’s pain is affecting them more than it’s affecting the actual sufferer. They need a break from time to time from the overwhelming crowd to refuel their energy. Few people are good face readers. Well, they might be an empath and still not be aware of this special virtue.
Who are empaths?
The adjective empath is derived from the word empathy. Empathy is the ability to understand the emotions and perspectives of others even if someone is not necessarily going through the same. It is the single most wonderful quality which is needed in this insensitive, self-centred world, especially in these difficult times. But this ability can be intensely draining for the empaths themselves. The sensibility of an empath is a gift for their friends and family for their caring and helping nature as they are excellent listeners and intelligent enough to come up with answers but this constant tendency of living on other’s experiences can be damaging to their mental health. Empathy without boundaries can be self-destructive.
What makes a female empath?
Female empaths can be the most emotionally intelligent, intuitive, committed, caring and fiercely independent women you have in your life.
Any relationship with a female empath is one of the most fulfilling relationships of life but not everyone is prepared for the kind of commitment and transparency they carry along in their personality.
It can be a bit overwhelming, especially for commitment-phobic men or looking for casual short term relationships. In friendships, empaths can be very generous, giving and intuitive to sense their friend’s needs and feelings but it’s not everyone’s cup of tea to reciprocate the same dedication and hypersensitivity towards them.
Some of the influencial women of the world who are recognized as hypersensitive and an empath are Nicole Kidman (actress and philanthropist ), Cate Blanchett (actress and philanthropist), Mother Teressa(Nobel Peace Prize winning Saint), Eleanor Roosevelt (former first lady of USA) and Hillary Swank ( Academy Award winning actress).
Let’s look at some of the traits of female empaths
1. They can sense the untold needs and emotions-
It is wonderful to have a female empath as a partner or friend as they can sense your needs and emotions even if you are struggling to confront them. They can even understand the feelings which you cannot find words to express. You are in the best company with female empaths if you need a partner who understands you thoroughly as they can see through you.
However, it can be a bit much for men who have been conditioned to hide their emotions throughout their lives. They can be uncomfortable in their minds and face being read all the time.
2. They expect nothing but 100% honesty-
Honesty is an integral part of their personality. It is something the female empaths live with every day. Lies, deceit, insincerity and hypocrisy are absolute no-no in their all relationships. They would rather break off ties with liars and cheaters.
Moreover, you cannot over smart them. They can read all your lies and be brutally honest about their feelings in your face. It’s not easy for many people who insert little lies in their statements and for whom it’s no big deal.
3. They are very intuitive-
Female empaths are walking talking energy catchers. No one needs to tell them upfront but they can feel the energy of a place, person and circumstances. They are hypersensitive to pick up the vibes instantly therefore social circumstances may leave them emotionally as well as physically drained. If you are in a relationship with them, you both need to set boundaries about partying and frequently visiting crowded places like bars, musical concerts and events. Don’t worry they will be empathetic enough to let you live your way if you let them be themselves.
4. Not a small talker-
Empaths prefer deep conversations, although they mostly make great listeners than a talker. Dissing, gossiping, bitching or any negative conversation is off the list.
They will give subtle hints about stepping aside from negative conversation by using their wit and humour or they can be bold enough to ask you to stop directly. It’s quite a tricky position because empaths are the magnets who attract toxic and narcissistic persons as they give the vibes of a great listener.
5. They are givers-
Empaths are unconditional givers. They often have a hard time saying no to someone. Most of the time they can’t stop themselves from helping others in need. When a female empath gets into a relationship with a man she will give everything to nurture that bond. She may act like a mother while taking care of her man and therefore, it can be a bit overwhelming for the men as they may not handle the attention.
Setting definite boundaries will help. It will be better for empaths to draw the line themselves as sometimes receivers will drain them completely without reciprocating the same. At other times, receivers need to tell the givers that they are getting uncomfortable with the intensity of attention.
6. Natural Healers-
Have you watched the video in which a white-clothed empath walks out from his home? In the way outwards with every encounter and after listening to everyone’s grief his conscience keeps on getting darker and in the end, it turns all black. Once he reaches back home, his dog rushes towards him, he hugs his dog and all his darkness fades away, he is back to his bright self. It’s pretty much how the empaths heal.
They heal best amidst nature and animals. They treat animals and plants as their humans. They need and truly cherish their solitude. They need to take a break from socializing from time to time. They are better off in the woods with their dogs and cats. The friends, family and partners of female empaths should just accept them as they are.
7. Great listeners and advisers
The reason why they are so popular amongst everyone despite not loving the attention is that they reflect the positive healing vibes.
Not only their friends often turn up to them for advice but often even strangers want to share their problems with the empaths. Why shouldn’t they? After all, empaths make great listeners, always looking to help the ones in need and intuitive and sharp enough to always find the answers.
8.They are passionate.
Nothing is mediocre in the lives of empaths. They can’t help but live in extremes. Their love, their detest, their bereavement all emotions are over the top. Female empaths are passionate, once they set their heart on someone then they are either present in the relationship with 200% or not present at all.
They are meant for life-long, deeper bonds and stay away from casual hookups and one night stands which is a little offbeat in the age of Tinder and online dating.
Doctor Judith Orloff is a psychiatrist and an empath and she specializes in treating highly sensitive people. Her research in the field is published in New York Times best-selling book The Empath’s Survival Guide: Life Strategies For Sensitive People.
This article uses references to her book and Instagram posts.
Suhani is a Company Secretary by education but a writer by passion. She has studied film appreciation at FTII, Pune. She is an independent blogger and has been blogging on cinema for more than seven years.
She believes in open dialogues about the taboo subjects in society and with Infano she wants to encourage its readers to have a conversation around them.