Healthy sex life goes a long way

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Sex is an inevitable part of our lives, and a healthy sex life makes this a lot more pleasurable. It is important to be sexually healthy, which means taking care of your physical, mental, and emotional health by practising safer sex. You need to be comfortable in your skin, sexuality, and relationship.

Sex is good for you

Healthy sex is good for your physical as well as mental health. It helps you to connect with people. It helps in better sleep, better self-esteem, better fitness, and reduces stress and tension. An orgasm releases endorphins, hormones that block pain and make you feel happy and high.

But, to avail the benefits, you need to maintain a healthy sex life which includes safer sex, regular medical check-ups, hygiene, and avoiding unwanted pregnancy.

Unprotected sex- An invitation to STDs

If you are sexually active, you need to be more careful as there are risks of getting STDs. More sexual partners increase the risk of Sexually Transmitted Diseases. So, it is important that you know your partner and not involve yourself in unsafe sex.

It is always advisable to use barriers like condoms to avoid STDs that spreads due to the exchange of fluids like HIV, hepatitis, and gonorrhoea. It also reduces the risk of acquiring diseases that spread through skin-to-skin contact like syphilis, Human Papillomavirus (HPV), etc.

Vaccines

Currently, there are vaccines available to prevent STDs. These vaccines are more effective when given before a man, or a woman gets involved in sexual activities. It is recommended to be given before the age of 11, but one can get vaccinated in their late 20s as well.

There are vaccines available for Hepatitis B that can cause liver damage. It is normally given during infancy. Hepatitis A does not spread during sex, but it can be transmitted through anal or oral intercourse. It is recommended to all children under the age of 1.

Regular check-ups and birth control

In case of any discomfort or issue, always consult your doctor. It is good to have regular check-ups for STDs if you have an active sex life. It reduces the chance of long-term consequences if the issue is detected on time and treated appropriately. Women also need to learn about healthcare and hygiene.

As a woman, you need to know your birth control options. Unwanted pregnancy can affect your health and sex life. There are numerous birth control options available, some might require a medical prescription, but some are affordable and readily available.

Barriers such as condoms (both male and female), cervical cap, etc. are some of the commonly used birth controls. Birth control pills, contraceptive sponge, diaphragm, under the skin implant, and sterilization are some of the methods which require medical attention. Talk to your doctor to know which option is best for you.

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It has far been oversimplified, the sexual bifurcation of people, with women being the focal point of all socio-cultural narrative in a traditional culture, especially in the Indian context. One of them is whether she is a virgin or a non-virgin. An act of sex that probably lasts for not more than five minutes can have a moral impact on a girl. ‘Losing’ virginity by a woman is often considered the point of womanly maturity irrespective of her intellectual growth or emotional evolution. Conventionally, virginity is considered sacred and has been a problematic tool to evaluate a woman’s morality. Naturally, it begs for a deeper social, cultural and scientific investigation.

A Common understanding of Virginity- the Hymen

It is commonly believed that ‘all women’ are born with a skin membrane in the genitals called hymen which breaks at the first intercourse resulting in blood oozing out of the vagina marking the end of virginity in a girl. The blood, therefore, is considered the ultimate testimony of virginity. Before we even begin to demystify this belief construct, it is remarkable to notice how virginity has often only been associated with women. However, while we are at it, there is no given method or practice to test the virginity of a man.

Not all women are born with a hymen

No, not all girls are born with a hymen. On the other hand, those born with one are prone to have their hymen worn off as they grow older. Therefore the presence of hymen does not indicate that the woman is a virgin. Talking about the hymen, Dr Nina Dolvik Brochman in her Ted Talk says, “The hymen has been used as a powerful tool in the effort to control women’s sexuality in about every culture, religion and historical decade.”

Heterosexuality and Homosexuality

As per the belief passed down from thousands of years, breaking virginity is a state of having intercourse among heterosexual people. It begs to question the inclusion of intimacy among couples with different sexual orientations. In that case, are all homosexual couples virgins? By the hetero-normative equation, all other forms of intimacy like oral sex, masturbation, intimacy among same-sex partners means nothing. Therefore, it can be argued that virginity is simply a false idea perpetuated to control a woman’s sexuality.

Commonly used terminologies

Some of the commonly used terminologies like ‘deflowering a girl’, ‘popping the cherry’, ‘red spot on a white bed sheet’ are used to indicate the breaking of a woman’s virginity. In many traditions, newly wedded brides are expected to bleed on their first night to prove their purity. There have been cases of assault on women if they fail to bleed on their first night. Often, there are no qualms about calling a woman, ‘damaged goods’ who have had sex in the past. This goes on to show how women and her sexuality have been commoditized as something that exists only to either please men or bear children.

In conclusion, the widely propagated idea that for a girl to prove she is good, all that is considered is whether or not has she had sex. Indisputably, such beliefs and practices deny women an identity that has to invariably do with her achievements, hard work and intellect.