Sex After Childbirth: All You Need To Know!

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Sex after pregnancy happens, but it might be the last thing on your mind. However, exhaustion and vaginal soreness might take charge. Whether you feel as though intimacy is the last thing that strikes your mind or you are in the mood to have sex, you need to understand sex after childbirth. Pregnancy and delivery bring a lot of changes in your body as well as changes in your sex life. Your vaginal tissue becomes thinner and more sensitive after post-delivery hormonal changes. Your uterus, cervix, and vagina have to return to their normal size. Breastfeeding lowers the libido. Thus, your body needs some break after delivery.

Doctors recommend women should wait for four to six weeks after vaginal delivery, and you might need to wait longer if you had a C-section. You also need to take things slow even after the doctor has given you the clear to resume sexual activities. However, no definite timeline says how long you need to wait to have sex after childbirth. Apart from physical recovery, you need to adjust to a new family member, changes in your daily routine, and less sleep. In addition, returning to sex too early might increase your risk of complications such as urine infection and postpartum haemorrhage.

How does delivery affect sex?

After delivery, sex will feel different. In 2005, it was found that 83% of females experienced sexual problems in the first three months after delivery. The number reduces as the post-pregnancy months increase.

The most common problem with sex after childbirth are:

Thin vaginal tissue
Bleeding
Vaginal dryness
Pain
Soreness
Loss of elasticity in vaginal tissue
Loose muscle
Perineal tear or episiotomy
Low libido
Fatigue

Hormones play a major role in post-delivery recovery. Oestrogen drops to pre-pregnancy levels in the days immediately after childbirth. During breastfeeding, oestrogen levels sink. Estrogen acts as natural lubrication, so a low level of this hormone increases the likelihood of vaginal dryness, which leads to irritation and even bleeding during sex. Resuming sex too soon might increase your risk of infection.

Caesarean delivery also affects vaginal sensation. The hormonal issue can make the vagina tissue dry and thin, resulting in painful sex. After C-section delivery, you’ll also need to make sure the incision site has been healed before resuming sex.

How soon can you get pregnant?

It was found that the first ovulation for women is around 6 weeks who weren’t breastfeeding, and some ovulated even earlier. After delivery, if you are breastfeeding, the hormonal benefits of nursing act as a natural form of birth control for 4-6 months.

Breastfeeding may be 98% effective in terms of birth control in women who:
~ haven’t started menstruating
~ are breastfeeding their child
~ are less than 6 months postpartum

You can also plan to use a reliable method of birth control if you are going to have sex after delivery and don’t want to have another child so soon.

Is bleeding normal during sex after normal delivery?

Whether you had a vaginal delivery or a C-section, postpartum bleeding is a normal part of recovery as your uterus heals. Bleeding shows how your body is getting rid of extra tissue, blood, and mucus, which is needed during pregnancy. You might also experience bleeding after having sex due to vaginal dryness. Wait for a few days. Consult your doctor if the bleeding doesn’t stop within 4-6 weeks. You may have signs of an infection or irritation that needs to be treated before having intercourse again.

How to get back into sex after childbirth?

Set the mood – Whatever it requires to set your mood and relax- a massage, candles, or a glass of wine – do it.
Start doing Kegels – Start doing your Kegels before you have sex. These exercises will engage and strengthen your pelvic floor, promote healing, improve muscle tone and increase blood flow. Doing so can help sex feel more comfortable once you are ready.
Take time to warm up – Don’t feel shy or afraid about saying what does and doesn’t feel good. Ask your partner to put in some effort to warm you up, making the main event better for both partners.
Get comfortable – Get some postpartum sex helpers, such as a supportive pillow that will help you feel more comfortable in certain sex positions and alleviate pressure points.
Lubricate – Many women find lubricant to be essential when having sex after delivery. Lubricant helps in reducing pain and increases pleasure.
Assume the position – Take time to identify the positions that feel good. Try those positions that will put less pressure on tender areas and offer control over the depth of penetration while having penetrative sex.

Ways to maintain intimacy after having a baby

Make small gestures – Small gestures such as a kiss, hug, an email about what turns you on, and a note all will help deliver results.
Get naked – Practising skin-to-skin with your partner will make you feel more connected. Hoping in the shower with your partner once your baby is asleep might as well turn it into an opportunity to spend some time together.
Schedule intimacy – Schedule some time for intimacy, just time to be together with your partner and have an intimate conversation, even if it doesn’t involve having sex.
Find some alone time – Even if you are not in the mood to have sex, try to spend some alone time with your partner without your baby. You can do this either in the morning or after your baby is sleeping.
Leave the bedroom – Try spicing things up by making love in another part of your home rather than in bed. Try the couch area, laundry room, or any other area of your home where you feel comfortable.
Get playful – Experiment with new toys together rather than your vibrator. You can also try erotic games or role-playing.

Give yourself some time to adjust to your new normal after pregnancy. It’s okay if you are not feeling ready for sex for a few months after delivery. Always remember you are not alone. Apart from sex, there are many other ways to be intimate with your partner that will make you feel comfortable.

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Lack of education about menstruation is one of the drawbacks to achieving adequate menstrual hygiene worldwide. Schools offer an important chance to transform menstrual hygiene programs that will benefit young girls in the future.

According to the research, India is home to about 113 million young girls and around 54% of these girls are unaware of menstruation before they have their first period. Around 77% of people aren’t aware that the uterus is the source of the bleeding and only 45% consider that menstruation is normal and a vast majority of people observe religious, socio-cultural and food taboos during their menstruation. In total 70% of mothers consider menstruation to be polluting and dirty and around 63 million girls live in homes which lack bathroom facilities.

Research from 2011 also suggested that in the country 88% of women and girls were using unhygienic, unsafe menstrual absorbents. Later, some progress was seen.

In 2015-16, the latest National Family Health Survey 4, India’s DHS reported that about 42.4% of young women, aged between 15 and 24 are still using unhygienic protection methods during their period.

Lack of education leads to stigma

We can see a bright future for menstrual health education for all genders, but in the previous years when it wasn’t a priority, the adults needed to know about menstrual health later in their life.

Monica Karpinski, founder and editor of The Femedic stated “I know from my world and my research that there is a huge education gap around menstruation. Menstruation is the second most popular category on our site behind sexual health. You can see a real appetite for information which communicates that education is not there to fill that gap.”

This education gap can have contagion effects. Lack of education on menstruation health and hygiene is an important foundation that will maintain the stigma around periods and it will affect a certain group of population. Premenstrual stress is also a domain around periods in which women faced stigma. The health and education of young people who menstruate can also get impacted by facing shame-inducing stigma. Period poverty can also add difficulties and hamper the lives and education of people menstruating.

Mae Matauka, a founder of the Mino Period and a trustee of The Vagina Museum stated, “It is important to remember that period poverty is not confined to just access to menstrual products. It also includes having poor knowledge of menstruation. This goes to have a more open and frank conversation about menstruation and more information and resources that will help tackle the taboo, stigma and shame.”

If lack of education feeds stigma, you need to increase education around menstrual health and hygiene. Along with girls, including boys in these topics from a young age is great for creating a society free from period stigma and this will also improve scientific knowledge of how the body works.

Kapinski agreed that teaching about menstrual health among all genders is important. She said, “Ideally, if this was being taught in school, you’d teach it in an inclusive way, so it wouldn’t be about genders, it would be about ‘this is what happens in this body part.”

Making clear, accessible menstrual health education is an important key to tackling period stigma, which is an obstacle to gender equality, improving lives and building knowledge.

A vital chance to improve Menstrual Hygiene Management (MHM)

Schools play a crucial role to address MHM comprehensively. So what about young girls and MHM in Indian schools?

A systematic review on MHM in India stated that an estimated 60% of young girls are enrolled in about 1.4 million schools. Around 24% of school girls didn’t attend their school during periods and only 37% of girls changed their absorbents in school.

Schools can be vehicles for the girl to change but they also serve to continue discrimination and stigma regarding menstruation.

Modules for teachers and peer educators must be developed in school that will provide comprehensive information and essentials on menstruation and MHM.

Safe, hygienic and functional toilets and separate toilets for girls
Water in toilet units for girls to wash their parts and menstrual absorbents
Provisions in toilet unit to hang and store belongings such as shelves and hooks
Proper dustbin for safe disposal of menstrual waste
Private and safe changing room or space
Soaps or liquids to wash hands

Through special programs, we can address detrimental social norms, provide girls education on menstrual health and hygiene, and access to a vast range of safe and hygienic menstrual absorbents and options for treatment of menstrual waste and safe disposal. Reach out to girls who are enrolled but do not attend schools or discontinue their education due to lack of knowledge and transform the menstrual health and hygiene landscape in India for a better tomorrow.

This #MenstrualHygieneDay, #Infano along with #TheLogicalIndian, is addressing nuanced conversations on period centering on the well being of the menstruators as they power through every day. Share your thoughts about inclusive menstrual health education in the comments because your views can trigger an important aspect that we all need to know and talk about! #IBleedMyWay #MHD2022