Intimacy After Child Birth

Written By: Sonali

April 5, 2022

Highlights

How does delivery affect sex?
Common problem with sex after childbirth
How soon can you get pregnant?
Is bleeding normal during sex after normal delivery?
How to get back into sex after childbirth?
Ways to maintain intimacy after having a baby

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Sex after pregnancy happens, but it might be the last thing on your mind. However, exhaustion and vaginal soreness might take charge.

Whether you feel as though intimacy is the last thing that strikes your mind or you are in the mood to have sex, you need to understand sex after childbirth. Pregnancy and delivery bring a lot of changes in your body as well as changes in your sex life. Your vaginal tissue becomes thinner and more sensitive after post-delivery hormonal changes. Your uterus, cervix, and vagina have to return to their normal size. Breastfeeding lowers the libido.

Thus, your body needs some break after delivery.

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Sex after pregnancy happens, but it might be the last thing on your mind. However, exhaustion and vaginal soreness might take charge. Whether you feel as though intimacy is the last thing that strikes your mind or you are in the mood to have sex, you need to understand sex after childbirth. Pregnancy and delivery bring a lot of changes in your body as well as changes in your sex life. Your vaginal tissue becomes thinner and more sensitive after post-delivery hormonal changes. Your uterus, cervix, and vagina have to return to their normal size. Breastfeeding lowers the libido. Thus, your body needs some break after delivery.

Doctors recommend women should wait for four to six weeks after vaginal delivery, and you might need to wait longer if you had a C-section. You also need to take things slow even after the doctor has given you the clear to resume sexual activities. However, no definite timeline says how long you need to wait to have sex after childbirth. Apart from physical recovery, you need to adjust to a new family member, changes in your daily routine, and less sleep. In addition, returning to sex too early might increase your risk of complications such as urine infection and postpartum haemorrhage.

How does delivery affect sex?

After delivery, sex will feel different. In 2005, it was found that 83% of females experienced sexual problems in the first three months after delivery. The number reduces as the post-pregnancy months increase.

The most common problem with sex after childbirth are:

Thin vaginal tissue
Bleeding
Vaginal dryness
Pain
Soreness
Loss of elasticity in vaginal tissue
Loose muscle
Perineal tear or episiotomy
Low libido
Fatigue

Hormones play a major role in post-delivery recovery. Oestrogen drops to pre-pregnancy levels in the days immediately after childbirth. During breastfeeding, oestrogen levels sink. Estrogen acts as natural lubrication, so a low level of this hormone increases the likelihood of vaginal dryness, which leads to irritation and even bleeding during sex. Resuming sex too soon might increase your risk of infection.

Caesarean delivery also affects vaginal sensation. The hormonal issue can make the vagina tissue dry and thin, resulting in painful sex. After C-section delivery, you’ll also need to make sure the incision site has been healed before resuming sex.

How soon can you get pregnant?

It was found that the first ovulation for women is around 6 weeks who weren’t breastfeeding, and some ovulated even earlier. After delivery, if you are breastfeeding, the hormonal benefits of nursing act as a natural form of birth control for 4-6 months.

Breastfeeding may be 98% effective in terms of birth control in women who:
~ haven’t started menstruating
~ are breastfeeding their child
~ are less than 6 months postpartum

You can also plan to use a reliable method of birth control if you are going to have sex after delivery and don’t want to have another child so soon.

Is bleeding normal during sex after normal delivery?

Whether you had a vaginal delivery or a C-section, postpartum bleeding is a normal part of recovery as your uterus heals. Bleeding shows how your body is getting rid of extra tissue, blood, and mucus, which is needed during pregnancy. You might also experience bleeding after having sex due to vaginal dryness. Wait for a few days. Consult your doctor if the bleeding doesn’t stop within 4-6 weeks. You may have signs of an infection or irritation that needs to be treated before having intercourse again.

How to get back into sex after childbirth?

Set the mood – Whatever it requires to set your mood and relax- a massage, candles, or a glass of wine – do it.
Start doing Kegels – Start doing your Kegels before you have sex. These exercises will engage and strengthen your pelvic floor, promote healing, improve muscle tone and increase blood flow. Doing so can help sex feel more comfortable once you are ready.
Take time to warm up – Don’t feel shy or afraid about saying what does and doesn’t feel good. Ask your partner to put in some effort to warm you up, making the main event better for both partners.
Get comfortable – Get some postpartum sex helpers, such as a supportive pillow that will help you feel more comfortable in certain sex positions and alleviate pressure points.
Lubricate – Many women find lubricant to be essential when having sex after delivery. Lubricant helps in reducing pain and increases pleasure.
Assume the position – Take time to identify the positions that feel good. Try those positions that will put less pressure on tender areas and offer control over the depth of penetration while having penetrative sex.

Ways to maintain intimacy after having a baby

Make small gestures – Small gestures such as a kiss, hug, an email about what turns you on, and a note all will help deliver results.
Get naked – Practising skin-to-skin with your partner will make you feel more connected. Hoping in the shower with your partner once your baby is asleep might as well turn it into an opportunity to spend some time together.
Schedule intimacy – Schedule some time for intimacy, just time to be together with your partner and have an intimate conversation, even if it doesn’t involve having sex.
Find some alone time – Even if you are not in the mood to have sex, try to spend some alone time with your partner without your baby. You can do this either in the morning or after your baby is sleeping.
Leave the bedroom – Try spicing things up by making love in another part of your home rather than in bed. Try the couch area, laundry room, or any other area of your home where you feel comfortable.
Get playful – Experiment with new toys together rather than your vibrator. You can also try erotic games or role-playing.

Give yourself some time to adjust to your new normal after pregnancy. It’s okay if you are not feeling ready for sex for a few months after delivery. Always remember you are not alone. Apart from sex, there are many other ways to be intimate with your partner that will make you feel comfortable.

Childbirth pregnancy pregnancy blogs Sex After Child Birth

Sonali

A 'non-9-5 desk job' ambivert geek who chooses her own audience, Sonali loves sharing stories and finding the corners where humanity still exists! She believes that every individual's story is unique and special. She loves writing about the untouched and unspoken segments of society. When not writing, you can find her listening to someone's stories or playing with dogs. Sonali values mental health and encourages people to speak their heart out!

Why Women Need Financial Independence?

Written By: Sonali

June 25, 2021 | 04:16 PM |

318

Highlights

Why Women Need Financial Independence?
Why think of financial independence?
Consequences of not being financially independent.
What happens when women become financially independent?
Ways to become a financially independent woman.

Quick Read
Full Read

The COVID-19 pandemic struck the world when it was least prepared for. Ever since its inception, it has been a challenge to deal with. This situation has been an eyeopener in making us realise the importance of financial independence and financial security for both He and She. Especially for women, it turned out to be more difficult. But the question is why is it so much more important for women!!

Well, financial independence is a great way of giving women the authority to actually think good for themselves and act accordingly. Women don’t need to be working in MNC’s or Government offices to label themselves as financially independent. They could be doing a variety of other things ranging from daily wage workers (for women coming from low-income families) to running a tiffin business from home (for middle-class women having little education).

According to the United Nations Global Compact study, it is shocking to see that with the advancements in the economy, female labour participation in India decreased from 34 % in 2016 to 24.8 % in 2020. Only if India raises the participation of women to the level that men do then it will increase the nation’s GDP by 27 per cent. Thereby placing India in a good position in the global economy.

There are a variety of reasons supporting the idea of financial independence for women. Read to know more in depth!

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The COVID-19 pandemic struck the world when it was least prepared for. Ever since its inception, it has been a challenge to deal with. Things around us have become uncertain and prone to losses. When I look at this, I realise that the pandemic not just aimed at taking away lives but has shattered people to their core by taking away their livelihoods as well.

This situation has been an eyeopener in making us realise the importance of financial independence and financial security for both He and She. Especially for women, it turned out to be more difficult. But the question is why is it so much more important for women!!

Why think of financial independence?

We often hear the term ‘Women Empowerment’, but only a handful of people can decode the term. Empowerment means giving someone the ability to control their life and claim their rights. Therefore, the term emphasises giving women the power and ability to control their lives.

Financial independence is a great way of doing the same. It gives women the authority to actually think good for themselves and act accordingly.

Women don’t need to be working in MNC’s or Government offices to label themselves as financially independent. They could be doing a variety of other things ranging from daily wage workers (for women coming from low-income families) to running a tiffin business from home (for middle-class women having little education).

Consequences of not being financially independent

Humans automatically take control of the steering of their lives when they start to earn. Women are no different.

Financial independence becomes more important for women who live in abusive households. Reports suggest that 70% of women in India face some form of domestic violence. Still, they continue to live with their abuser as they lack financial independence; the situation would be completely different only if they had the monetary resources in their hand.

What happens when women become financially independent?

Studies show that when a woman earns, she invests 90% of her earnings into their families compared to only 30% to 40% for a man.

According to the United Nations Global Compact study, it is shocking to see that with the advancements in the economy, female labour participation in India decreased from 34 % in 2016 to 24.8 % in 2020. It also reports that out of the 153 countries that were part of the study, India is the only country where the economic gender gap is wider than the political gap.

Only if India raises the participation of women to the level that men do then it will increase the nation’s GDP by 27 per cent. Thereby placing India in a good position in the global economy.

There are a variety of reasons supporting the idea of financial independence for women. A few of them are discussed below:

Enhance their self-worth

The power of liberty increases one’s self-worth; in a country like India, financial independence is of prime importance for Indian women where gender equality is asymmetrical. A significant proportion of Indian women are dependent on their spouses, making it an arduous task for them to walk out of an abusive marriage. Earning money instils within them the power to make a strong decision when it comes to their life.

Support the family

There is a lot of pressure on the sole breadwinner of any family, which in most cases is the husband. When the only earning member in the family is the husband, there is a lot of pressure on them. Given the unpredictable situation of jobs in the country, pink slips are no longer a surprise.

The COVID-19 situation has further accelerated this problem. While people argue over the fact that women don’t need to work as their husbands, fathers, or brothers earn; extra income does not really harm. Especially in such delicate times, it would be a lot of help.

Facing emergency situations

In life, everything does not go as per plan. We need to be prepared for any kind of unexpected turn of events. When there is an extra earning member in the family, there is a comfort in dealing with such situations.

Sadly, the middle-class family survives from paycheque to paycheque, and such situations are not welcomed in such houses. If there is one more earning member in the family, it eradicates this problem as the extra money can be kept aside for emergencies.

Become a role model

Whenever we talk about women in leadership, very few names pop up in our minds. Ever wondered why?

The harsh truth is we don’t have many female leaders. A single woman’s financial independence can act as a source of inspiration for all those women who are willing to do something but hesitate to take a step forward. Your progress chart will become directly proportional to the success rate of many other women who look up to you. A financially independent woman has the power to motivate and shape the lives of millions of women. You don’t realise, but that’s a big responsibility!

Ways to become a financially independent woman

Effective financial planning:

Determining real and achievable financial goals is the secret spice of being efficiently financially independent. Setting practical goals helps you to be in control of your income, investments and expenses.

Use personalised financial plan:

Choosing a plan just because it worked out great for your friend would be the last mistake you want to commit while choosing a financial plan. It is so because the same plan could do you more harm than reaping profits. Personalisation is the key to successful financial planning.

Select plans keeping in account your financial goals and needs.

Plan for the unexpected:

I have already talked a lot about how important it is to have an extra source of income in moments of crisis. Even a woman should be ready to deal with any unexpected events.

Aim at securing the future:

You don’t just earn for fun, do you?

Once you start earning, you have certain responsibilities on your shoulder. As a working woman, it should be your major concern that your family goes through little or no financial stress in your absence as well. Begin to invest in insurance plans, mutual funds etc., as it will support financial continuity.

Financial independence is important for each one of us, irrespective of our age and marital status. It is high time people must comprehend that the financial independence of a woman or a working woman does not harm the reputation of the family. It is perfectly okay for a family to run on the income of a woman.

We live in the 21st era where we talk about equality. But this debate has no end if we fail to perceive the importance of women being financially independent. Even today, situations are highly uncertain for a woman in society. The majority of the times, she does not get a say in her significant life-changing decisions. She has to face a lot of problems and criticisms. Financial security gives her the power to think and take a stand for herself. It makes her believe her own instincts and complete her journey.

Infano supports every woman out there to take a step towards her success. Do not forget to read our #PassionToProfession column for all those inspiring stories of women who are disrupting the business and entrepreneurial system!

Business Empowerment Finance financial independence women empowerment