Shreya Mitra still regrets that she couldn’t preserve the memories of her son’s first year. “It was a gloomy dark phase, the phase where I fought every single day to make it through another day,” recalls the 29 YO mother who went through a brain hemorrhage, postpartum depression (PPD), and premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD).
“I can never forget 2016! While getting pregnant was wonderful, I lost my grandma the very next month when I found out about it; and that impacted me. I felt sick. My mother got diagnosed with cancer. My son got diagnosed with clubbed feet in my anomaly. My husband got down with dengue. It was a hell of a period for me,” Shreya recalls. “While my mother flew back to me from Mumbai for my delivery, it was difficult to see her in that condition.”
Shreya gave birth to little Shaan on 01.12.2016, and five days later, suffered a brain hemorrhage. She was immediately taken to Chennai by her husband and father-in-law. Her life was at stake, and Shaan stayed back with his grandmother and aunt.
“I was saved. Yes, I fought a lot, but soon I started getting panic attacks, anxiety attacks, unexplainable postpartum rage, and I went into depression,” Shreya calls it a horrible phase, and it wasn’t easy to overcome it. The worst was not knowing what was happening to her because all the reactions were behavioral.
“I became a monster! I knew I needed help, but I had no idea about what had changed. I shared my emotions on a mothers’ forum, and when I told them how I felt about hating motherhood, feeling disconnected with my child, sudden anger and crying moments, unwillingness to wake up every morning, they asked me to get screened for PPD”.
And that was it — that’s how Shreya got introduced to PPD. She started taking sessions, and though the depression phase was getting fade, her anxiety persisted and was only triggered when someone in the family fell sick.
What is Postpartum Depression?
Postpartum depression is a common mental illness that affects up to one in seven mothers. It’s the “baby blues” that many women experience after their baby is born. The symptoms of postpartum depression are similar to other forms of depression, but they can be made worse by lack of sleep, difficulty breastfeeding, and other factors related to caring for an infant. Mothers who have postpartum depression may feel down or sad much of the time, or restless or irritable.
According to a report recently published by the World Health Organisation (WHO), about 22 percent of Indian mothers suffer from postpartum depression (PPD). PPD is the most common complication of childbirth. It is a form of depression. Symptoms include sadness, low energy, feelings of worthlessness, and detachment from your baby that can interfere with your ability to care for your baby and enjoy your time together. If left untreated it can develop into postpartum psychosis.
“In my time, I wish someone would have mentioned the PPD even once! It would have helped me earlier, and I wouldn’t have suffered for so long!”
“PPD took away one whole year of my life, and I don’t know who to blame, or how to get closure. I will never get the first year of my child back, and it hurts knowing that it would have been prevented or tackled in a better way if I had known about it earlier,” Shreya says.
When she took this experience of hers online, many women, including Shreya’s friends, reached out to her and shared their experiences. She soon started Raising Shaan, where she writes about maternal mental health. Shreya is trying to increase awareness about maternal health, normalize depression, its causes, and consequences.
Treatment for Postpartum Depression?
Treatment for postpartum depression is needed immediately because it can render a mother with unpleasant thoughts. Therapy with antidepressant medication is proven to be most effective.
Each new mother responds differently to postpartum depression and may not have every symptom listed. It is not only the new mothers who are vulnerable to this mental disorder, but even fathers are also susceptible to postpartum depression. According to the researchers, this is because fathers are often involved in caring for their children, which may often put them at the same level of risk as the new mothers.
“Even if there is one woman I can reach out to and say that what you are feeling is normal and things would get better, you don’t need to be guilty; I think I would be able to justify my work. This is how much it matters to me,” Shreya finds it really fulfilling when other women reach out to her and find it comfortable to share their emotions with her.
Being someone who went through the same, Shreya finds it easy to connect with people. She realizes how much the screening of mental health along with PPD matters in the first 45 days and how it should be a part of the regular health checkups.
“PPD took away one whole year of my life, and I don’t know who to blame, or how to get closure. I will never get the first year of my child back, and it hurts knowing that it would have been prevented or tackled in a better way if I had known about it earlier,” Shreya says.
PPD did impact not only Shreya but also her family. Her husband was clueless. “He wanted to help, but I was cutting everyone off. He didn’t know what had happened but kept saying that something about me changed after giving birth to Shaan,” for someone like Shreya who used to be a jolly and amicable started getting angry for no reason and she felt pathetic every time she cried or felt disconnected from Shaan.
“If you’re someone who’s suffering from mental illness and feels that you’ve changed after delivery, it’s not you, it’s the hormones. It might be hard to believe, but yes, it does get better over time. All you need is support and love,” Shreya concludes.
Signs and Symptoms: How to identify postpartum depression?
The following list is a general guideline.
Look out for these signs.
- Changes in eating habits- Either eating too much, not eating at all, overeating, or undereating.
- Changes in sleeping habits- Either sleeping too much or not enough.
- Changes in activity levels- Either being more active, less active, or unable to be physically active.
- Change in behavior- Being irritable than usual. Having extreme mood swings which last for short periods. Takes too much care of the baby or ignores it completely
Symptoms of PPD can include:
- Excessive crying, or “emotional contagion”—crying when watching a sad movie, for example
- Insomnia
- Brief euphoria after spending time with the baby
- Anger at the baby’s father
- Anxiety over parenting skills
- Shame about not wanting to breastfeed or expressing milk, especially if it is in contrast with cultural norms.
Researchers hope that by identifying the risk factors and how to deal with them, they can improve the mental and emotional well-being of new parents.
If you are concerned that you or someone you know may be suffering from postpartum depression, please contact your healthcare provider for specific questions about your condition.
For more on mental health from Infano, click here.
This article is a part of the series on #10DaysOfMentalHealth with Infano X The Logical Indian