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Man Arrested For Flashing At Bengaluru Based Writer!

Written By: Sonali
November 9, 2020
  • Full Read
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“Is flashing an offence in India?”, asks Nupur Saraswat, a Bengaluru based writer who came out for help on Instagram yesterday.

“I’ve lived in this house for over one month now. And I’ve never seen this man before. His distance/ view of my terrace is in the forth slide. He waited there for hours looking at me, which made me uneasy but not to the extent that I needed to ask him to fuck off. Then at a point when he knew I was looking, he pulled his pants down and held his penis at me. Smiling that FUCKING smile.

He is two, TWO buildings away from me. I live alone in the terrace house. I have informed my landlords. The next step is to figure out a way to get legal help. Is flashing an offence in India? Is there a helpline I can call? And how do I make sure that something happens and I am not left in a position where this person a) knows I have reported him, and b) is scot-free.

The last picture is of me, before this. Before I realized that I was about to feel very very threatened in a house, I have come to love. Before I would be shaking in anger and embarrassment (????) and second-guessing if it is my solitude that provoked him or my outfit, I could SCREAM right now, but I want to channel my anger in a tactical way. So if YOU can help me, please DM me,” posted the woman on Instagram.

So what happened next? Tons of people shared their gyaan on whether flashing is really an offence. What should a woman do if some bottlehead cannot keep his organs inside his pants?

Nupur said that people very kind enough to help her via different mediums — different NGOs, helplines including NCW & 1091, and social media accounts were suggested to her — but also a lot of them told her that it is OKAY and such cases often happens with women and that she must forget about this and move on.

But Nupur believes that this is what gives those men courage to do it more often, as they think that women are mostly afraid; and some of them even take their chuppi as a form of consent and keeps on doing more traumatic nuisance than this.

Nupur knew that this needed to be stopped. She knew that this needs some repercussions if not a legal action. She reached out to every possible helpline number of Karnataka & India, but she found that most of these numbers weren’t really helpful. “They were either out of service or not reachable. I wonder how can they still exist on Google and what would someone do if she really needs help! This is so terrifying,” she told Infano.

Nevertheless, she was determined to teach that man a lesson, and she wanted that to be quick as she wasn’t sure if he lived in that area or was just a visitor. Moreover, that one incident didn’t let her sleep whole night, and the trauma and possibility of something similar happening again was scaring her more.

After consulting with her friends, she dialled 100 which redirected her to the Koramangala Police Station and further to the Viveknagar Police Station as for the former one it was out of the jurisdiction area. 

The very next day of this incident, the 4th block of Koramangala witnessed eight cops and four police vans in the area. The officers took no time in guarding out the man, and they took him to the police station to do the needful.

When asked about this, Nupur said that there was no female officer with the team, but the male officers did ask her if she wanted to take another cab/ auto. She was introduced to the lady officer on reaching the station, and she was asked whether she wanted to do press charges against the man or not. She highly recommends other women to call a lady officer while calling the police no matter what.

“I will say this, as a 5’2 woman surrounded by 4 cop cars and 8 male officers and the entirety of the neighbourhood looking at me for “what’s going on”— I don’t wish it on anyone. But i am glad I went thru it because only after it all I found out the predator had been flashing and harassing a 15-year-old in the neighbourhood too. I felt so must safer and reassured by the professional badassery of Inspector Jahida of Viveknagar station, who arrested the wee man and promised me corrective recourse and took my complaint with kindness. When this stranger tried to turn the narrative by saying I am his ex, she believed in me instead. Thanks, @blrcitypolice for getting this done before breakfast ✊🏽,” she concluded in her latest Instagram post.

Soon after this, her Instagram DM was filled with queries/ advice for similar cases, several women shared their personal experience with her, and a lot of people applauded her for this bold step.

Nupur says a part of her was unable to accept if it really happened with her — we hear so many about so many cases, but it does scare us every time we hear it from someone we know!

Though a lot of people told her that this was a normal incident, she knew it wasn’t — and no matter how hard you try not to think about, it won’t go away she says. It will scare you every time you step out, every time a man gives you a creepy look and every time you think of travelling alone. 

Infano reached out to Nupur to listen to her horrific experience and we really appreciate her decision. #InfanoWomen

bangalorebengaluruinspirationnupursexual abusesexual assault

Sonali

A 'non-9-5 desk job' ambivert geek who chooses her own audience, Sonali loves sharing stories and finding the corners where humanity still exists! She believes that every individual's story is unique and special. She loves writing about the untouched and unspoken segments of society. When not writing, you can find her listening to someone's stories or playing with dogs. Sonali values mental health and encourages people to speak their heart out!

3 thoughts on “Man Arrested For Flashing At Bengaluru Based Writer!”

  1. Ahmed Hassan
    November 10, 2020 at 9:59 am

    she is beautiful

    Reply
    • Arya Kaur
      November 13, 2020 at 4:46 am

      Is that what your take away is, from this woman’s ordeal? The mindset of people like you is equally to blame. You managed to objectify her, and missed the point of this article entirely. Congratulations.

      Reply
  2. Jalees
    November 10, 2020 at 5:06 pm

    No, this is not a normal incident and I am glad that she spoke up. I just pray for her safety and her future prosperity. I believe, as said by the writer, man do take advantage of their chuppi and they need to be exposed but with the use of a proper channel of trial and order.

    Reply

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Infano Care

Coping Tips For The Festive Season For People With A Mental Health Disorder

Written By: Tasneem Akbari Kutubuddin
November 2, 2021 | 10:00 AM |
495

Highlights

  • Spending time with family, friends, and colleagues can be a great way to get in the Diwali spirit, but it also has the potential to be difficult if someone is struggling with a mental health disorder.
  • Whether it’s coping mechanisms to deal with the social aspect of the festive season or tips for improving your general mood, this blog post will help prepare you for this tough time of year.
  • Full Read
Spread the love

The festive season is a busy time for everyone. Spending time with family, friends, and colleagues can be a great way to get in the Christmas spirit, but it also has the potential to be difficult if someone is struggling with a mental health disorder. 

This can be a difficult time of year for many people. It’s a time that only comes once a year, which means that there’s no escaping from it. That said, there are ways to make the festive season a bit more tolerable. Whether it’s coping mechanisms to deal with the social aspect of the festive season or tips for improving your general mood, this blog post will help prepare you for this tough time of year.

Why are people with a mental health disorder more at risk during this time of year?

The festive season can be an especially difficult time for people who are at risk of mental health disorders. Increased alcohol consumption, weight gain, sleep deprivation, and financial stress can all contribute to this increased risk.

Festivals and celebrations are even more stressful for women. As most women take the forefront and handle the organizing and taking care of the traditions, rituals, customs that are carried on during this time, also the preparation of food, cleaning the house and decorating it are overseen by them in many traditional Indian settings. Though many enjoy it, this may also take a toll on women’s health and this is something we hardly consider.

It’s not always easy to cope with the demands of socializing. Sometimes it can feel like there’s no time for anything other than work or family. Social prescribing is a way of using existing resources to reduce stress, isolation, and anxiety. It could involve visiting your GP, seeing your psychotherapist or engaging with friends and family.

Coping tips for the festive season

During the holidays, some people feel their mood worsen as they overindulge. This holiday season, especially with the pandemic and loss of many loved ones, sadness, anxiety, and depression may be rampant. 

Whether you’re feeling pressure to be joyful or another negative emotion, take a break from technology and try one of these coping tips to beat the lows around the festive season.

On top of battling depression beforehand, ringing in the holiday season may deepen it for some people. From using coping tips to make it through the season to checking in with loved ones, there are ways to get through this difficult time.

While feelings of anxiety and stress can often get the better of some people, according to Alford you can combat those low spirits with certain coping tips. Here are some approaches to dealing with stress, anxiety, and depression around this time of the year.

Acknowledge and address your feelings

. If you avoid whatever it is you’re feeling, that will not solve the problem but postpone it. For example, if someone close to you has passed away recently or if you’re having a relationship issue with your mother, friend or brother – it’s absolutely normal to not be in the mood for celebration and fun. You don’t have to force yourself to be happy just because you think the time of the year demands it.

Rejoice in the now and be genuine

With holiday stress, don’t try to compare yourself to prior years–you are always changing! For happiness inspiration year-round, consider one of their free workshops. When you feel stressed, unplug from social media and apps to be present for this time of year. It may seem like a good idea to document your holidays for Instagram, but in reality, it can make you feel pressured and anxious. Prioritize the moments with friends and family over any opportunities to snap a picture. Remember that documenting everything does not mean anything is better!

Don’t say yes when you really mean no

Overwhelmed?   free yourself from peer pressure and try to set some boundaries, don’t feel pressured to overindulge, and remember that self-care is important.  This is the time to take care of yourself. It’s so easy to get caught up in the holiday season and forget about yourself. But this is arguably the most important time of year to be self-care-oriented. Don’t focus on everyone else and their needs, take some time for yourself. This is the perfect time to catch up on your favorite television shows or watch a movie, read a book or spend some time doing things that make you happy.

For more blog posts on mental health disorder by Infano, click here.

coping mechanismDepressionmental health disorder

Tasneem Akbari Kutubuddin

Tasneem Akbari Kutubuddin has done her masters in Journalism & Communication and has worked as a senior journalist, editor and columnist for leading publications like The Logical Indian, Deccan Chronicle, Worldwide Media Corporation, The Bridge and Provoke.
With Infano, she hopes to create more awareness about women’s health issues. Suffering with Fibromyalgia, a chronic pain condition, she has also been advocating for its awareness through media.

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